So get ready to laugh your dicks off.

10.   Bonnaroo -  Not only does Aziz come down to the dirty south, where I am living for a few months, to deliver awesome sexually-charged comedy, but he ALSO enjoys the local produce – aka mushrooms.  It’s nice to have a comedian tell a few jokes about cool drugs, instead of talking about doing blow off a 40 year old hooker in upstate new york. 

9. Raaaaaaaandy – If you made the mistake of watching that horrible movie Funny People, you will remember him as the only damn highlight.  Who wants to watch Adam Sandler in a movie that tries to copy Philadelphia, but at the last minute he survives.  Then goes on to try and steal back his average looking ex-wife.  I only watched this movie because I saw so many hilarious videos of Raaaaaaaandy on youtube.  This movie should have been edited down to the 3 minutes he had onscreen.  The rest was crap.

8.  Fuck Tales - I will never tell a sex story again.  I will only tell fuck tales.  Aziz is a genius for thinking of this term.  He also reminds us all how baller it can be to die while eating a girl out in a hot tub.  Two precious lessons.

7.  Flight of the Conchords - Now this show is pretty funny, but they are always singing songs.  Aziz Ansari is one of the few badass characters to NOT sing a lame song to make me laugh.  He was just racist against Australians.  And really who isn’t?  They are always surfing and working on their tans and waxing each other’s abs.  No thanks!

6. Best Lil John Impression Ever – If you have ever seen Parks & Recreation, it’s a parody of the Office which is a parody of the UK show the Office, then you know what I am talking about.  He knows how to liven up a party on a show that is trying to be another show that is trying to be another show.

5.  Kanye West -  Not only did he party with Kanye West, he then went on to tell awesome jokes about it.  THEN he got his cousin on Kanye’s website.  That is baller.  Also very few white guys hang out with Kanye.  So he is in the minority.

4.  South Carolina -  He is from South Carolina but everyone thinks he is from Libya.  People are impressed that he can sound so American.  I have been to South Carolina and between the dip and the missing teeth I didn’t know what anyone was talking about.  I am impressed that I can understand him, but not because I expected a libyan accent, I expected a big redneck one.

3.  He has a DJ -  I am always happy when there is more work for DJs in this world.  Everyone should have badass entry music every time they walk into a room and especially on stage.

2.  Google - This playboy goes out there and googles himself.

1.  A sensual evening – This is the best comedy central special that I have seen in years.  I was in my room laughing my dick off and my roommate ran in to see if I was dying.  I am 100% gonna have sex while watching this in the near future.  And when I do I will let you know if it was better than watching SuperBad while banging Sparkles doggy style.  Because that was pretty badass.

Basically this guy is one of the few comedians who doesn’t tell jokes about how lame he is.  This guy is an up and coming legend.  I need to keep him famous so he keeps telling the jokes that I love.  I will never look at CVS the same way again, that’s for sure.

All week she was making comments about how men don’t understand women.  The thing is all of her comments were the kinda crap you read in FHM or Maxim.  You know, the stuff that is totally inaccurate and useless.

Her big thing is that she is part of the EFT scam.  If you haven’t seen tapping, you are gonna love the video.  The thing is tapping is supposed to remove your anxieties.  But she taps ALL THE TIME.  It’s really hard to not laugh when you are in a seminar and this girl is tapping like a maniac.  She just taps her chest all the time.  I had a friend when I was younger who had a simliar tic.  But he had MS and if I didn’t know it was on purpose, I would think she had a nervous system disease.

So imagine you’re in a bar and you see a girl tapping her chest.  Over and Over.  It’s really fast and looks super nervous.  But she believes that you can tap anything out.  Including shit tests.  I almost died when she said that.  It’s another video highlight.

She was really weird during Hypnotica’s lecture and said she was doing some weird tantric thing.  She was being super sexual and squirmy and it really just weirded me out.  I guess she wrote something on her blog about banging a bunch of guys there.  Some of the instructors or whatever, but honestly it’s really gross to me.

When I look at a woman I look at her upper arm to see if there is hidden fat and then I look at her hands.  And based on her hands I would say Erika is mid 40s.  I don’t know her “actual” age.  I just know how old she looks.

The other weird thing is that she spends all day slathering lipstick on.  I don’t know who taught her how to use make up but it was clearly a clown or blind person.  I think she may have purchased a makeup shotgun from the Simpsons.

—

Update I wrote the above right after I left Vegas.  I felt bad that it was so harsh and the video is so rough that I wasn’t going to post either.  But she posted a bunch of lies on her blog.  I am totally not down with that.  I have written about my being a dick so many times on here that you know I only tell the truth.  Writing all this stuff about Vegas has probably hurt my career but I gotta do what I believe.

Anyways, the thing that really upset me is that on her blog she called the two girls that her friends abused “porn stars” the girls are actually models who mostly do events like car shows.  So I think that was really lame.  She was trying to make her story sound cooler, but it’s not cool in my book.  I think there is a huge difference between getting paid to stand next to a car in short shorts and getting banged on camera.  I think both professions are cool, but I feel like these girls deserve a little honesty.

I personally dabbled with tapping when I first got into game.  It’s totally a placebo at best.  The hours you have to put in to make a difference are insane.  Time spend in the actual field is worth 10x as much.  And for real you can’t tap away shit tests.  As soon as a girl catches you tapping, you are burned.

I have been so busy with my new fulltime job that I haven’t had time to write more about Vegas.  I pretty much hit most of the highlights.  I have to say that the instructors there were pretty much a joke.  Somehow guys think that if they attend one workshop or bootcamp they can hang up a shingle and call themselves an instructor.

I think people should take this business more seriously.  There is really no oversite and I guess that is how there are so many charlatans out there.  Taking money from people when you’re not qualified is not cool in my book.  I am always working my butt off when I’m with a student and I do everything I can to blow up his social life.

Most of the ‘instructors’ in Vegas spent their time hanging out and ignoring students.  I saw a lot of them try and steal girls from students.  That is really shocking.  Some of the guys were so shocked at the end of the week with the students’ complaints.

Students were going off on their own without instructors and getting laid.  Then instructors who did nothing all week would take credit.  I could go name by name with who sucked, but I think the big part is a total lack of direction from the leadership.  Johnny basically never came to the infield stuff and there was no plan.  So without leadership all the instructors bounced around.

I will say that in my opinion Hypnotica, AFC Adam and Orleans were the only other guys there who should still be in this industry.  Orleans was the only instructor who actually got laid.  And his story is legendary.  He didn’t really spend much time with the students.  But overall I know he kept asking Johnny what was expected.  So at least he showed them what was possible.

I really like Harlequin, but he spent the whole time going off and doing awesome things with his buddy.  After the first day students basically never saw him.  Which is a real shame because his game is really tight and he has a lot of knowledge.

Just all these instructors who were totally distracted or never around.

This guy should not be allowed around women, let alone be allowed to try and make a living in the dating business.  He dresses like a cheese-dick from the seventies and is obsessed with dominating the room.

He walked into every seminar late and made a ton of noise to make sure he got noticed.  If you walk in late while someone else is talking, you don't stop the whole thing to say your greetings to everyone. 

This guy leads a crew of really creepy guys who can't seem to open sets, let alone close them.  His crew left trash all over the hotel and earned Johnny a $500 fine for leaving their laptops in a hotel room we were no longer using.  The world seems to be their trashcan.  This guy talks a lot about the women he has seduced, but when called out by Orleans didn't actually know what a shit test was.

He explained that the reason he performed so poorly infield was because he is not good at picking up women, he is good at getting picked up.  How can anyone actually say this?  He then explained that he went around a club with the goal of getting the strongest rejection possible and was hoping to be slapped by a woman. 

He tricked two models into coming into his seminar and demonstrated a complete and total lack of understanding of women.  He placed them on barstools next to the window with thirty guys between them and the door.  They looked trapped and were fidgeting like crazy.  His creepy friend then kept offering them food and the girls said they wanted to leave and go eat at a restaraunt.  It became clear that this was not an option and then this guy bragged about "taking care of his women."

He explained to the girls that he creates a container in which women can surrender to him.  He tried to embarass the students by pointing to them and asking the girls to rate them.  I then explained to him that girls care about personality more than looks.  When he asked in broken English if this was true he was SHOCKED that the girl agreed with me.  One of the students suggest that the girls guess which guys were coaches and which were students.  This idiot freaked out again and said that was a terrible idea.

When he talked about trying to get a bad reaction from women and just trying to get a date for a party, I asked the girl if she thought this was nice or if she wanted to slap him in the face.  She said she wanted to slap him in the face.  He of course scrambled to try and control her.

The girl even said "I have read the game, do you guys teach pickup stuff?"  His creepy partner said "No, nothing like that, I teach men to dominate women."  Both girls cringed and so did I.

I could go into more detail about the different ways this guy suggested lying to women, but seeing him do it to a woman's face was more than enough.  It was so obvious he was lying I wanted to die.  This guy and his crew should be kicked out of the dating industry.  Ideally they would be tarred and feathered.

He has already given a talk today at another event and lied about what happened in Vegas.  He claimed he was knee deep in pornstars.  I was at EVERY event he went to.  He talked to one girl.  And only because she was dating a guy Johnny knows.  Guess what – I talked to her too.  Five minutes with a friend's girlfriend is NOT something to blog about.

There is plenty more I could say about this guy.  My final point will be that the only way he was able to get a date for a fetish party was by bringing a prostitute.  And not a nice one.  Steer clear of this idiot.

If you put a gun to his family he wouldn't be able to open a set.  And of course he can't close one.  Stealing some material from pu101 and AMP does not a dating coach make you be.

Overall, this guy is the worst dating coach I have ever seen.  He has zero respect for women and even less understanding.  I have watched him lie to women, students and other coaches directly.  So now you know.  The guy is a creep.

I am going to write an individual post reviewing each coach I met this week, but for now I will just give you the highlights.  I walked out of the entire things yesterday.  Along with one of the paying students.  3 others told me they wanted refunds for how badly they were treated and lied to.

Highlights -

1. Johnny didn't do a SINGLE demo the entire week

2. Most of the coaches took one workshop with him a year ago and started a dating company

3. I got drunk one night and yelled at a coach to open a set or quit the business.  So far he has done neither.

4. Only one coach got laid all week.  Unfortunately, he spent all his time doing that instead of coaching the students.  To be honest I don't blame him, as neither of us realized the other coaches were terrible until much later in the week.

5.  Nearly every coach and student was forced to change rooms at 10am during the week.  I actually had to change rooms 5 times in 5 days.  Due to horrible planning.

6.  The title of the event was learn to pick up porn stars at the AVN expo.  The students were never allowed to go to the AVN.  I asked several times and so did several students.  We were all told it wasn't good this year and that more seminars would be a better use of time.

7.  The students were sold on going to a super elite private fetish porn start afterparty.  Three of the students were turned away from the event for not being on the list.

8.  EVERY SINGLE coach who went to the party got in by taking a prostitute – Except for my man Orleans.

9.  Two students missed the infield events two nights in a row – and nobody noticed except for me.

10. Steve P and Future never came.  And I found out that although he was advertised for months, Orleans was only booked 3 days before the event.

11. The most authority was given to Hristiyan Atanasov.  He opened zero sets all week and was shot down over and over.  He had the balls to say in seminar that he isn't good at picking up women, he is good at getting picked up. 

12.  This "coach" tricked to models into coming into a seminar, positioned them on barstools next to the window with 20 strange guys between them and the door and then proceeded to make them so uncomfortable that by the end one of the girls said she wanted to slap him.  (This review is gonna BLOW YOUR MINDS)

13.  One of the students stormed out of the seminar he was so offended and nobody paid attention.

14.  Most of the students got zero in-field coaching as all of the coaches were too busy trying to meet girls themselves.

15.  AFC Adam's dad was forced to room with me, even though the poor guy is 70 and doesn't deserve to be in such an awkward situation.

16.  Erika Awakening told a student that you can use EFT to "tap away shit-tests" – don't worry I actually got this on video.

17.  I ended up calling my dad 4 days into the workshop nearly in tears telling him I wanna come home from summer camp early.  I am in VEGAS and I wanted to go home.  It was that bad.

18.  The students were taken to the same bar in field 5 nights in a row.  The ratio was never better than 20-1, but they were told that they needed to tighten up their game.

19.  The students who signed up for an event called "Picking Up Porn Stars" were told that this was NOT a pickup event upon arrival.

20.  Everyone was housed in timeshare apartments instead of any of the nice hotels on the strip.

21.  A student and I got a room in a nice hotel for less than the workshop was charging and nobody cared.

22.  Johnny didn't even react until I posted a comment on facebook that I left a bad bootcamp.

23.  The students were brought to a last minute intervention because of my post and ONLY because I said they had all used the word refund with me and promised 1on1 infield with Johnny on Sunday – then THAT didn't even happen.

It has been 24 hours since I walked out of the bootcamp.  Before I left I tried to speak to Johnny and I did speak to several of the other coaches.  Nobody took any action until my comment on facebook.  I had forgotten how many coaches I'm friends with.  At first I was called a traitor.  Then for a while I was being accused of running a secret bootcamp behind the scenes.  THEN I was accused of sabotaging the whole event.  Finally, I was told that if they had known I was coaching in field I would have been told to stop, as an event called "Picking Up Porn Stars" was not about pickup but was about transcending the modern mindset. 

To be honest I REALLY TRIED to get down with this system and learn about moving my life to the next level.  In the end I learned that the core of the system is about lying to women and trying to bang as many married women as possible.  All week the talk was about emancipating women and freeing them from tying their sexuality to economics.  I thought that concept was cool.  Until I heard his "top students" talking about how they just wanted to bang some bitches this week.  I was so uncomfortable with how people talked about women all week that I wanted to leave days ago.  I have three sisters, a mom and two nieces.  Unlike the rest of these guys I think of women as people and apparently that is just all wrong.

I am trying not to sound bitter or anything, but instead to be totally honest about my experience.  Obviously, bringing me to this event was a mistake as I can't sit idly by and let students get screwed.  There are too many charlatans in this business.  All week people were bitching about Sinn hating  on Johnny. I met Sinn once and to be honest, the dude is pretty much a dick, but he IS a good instructor and his blog is good.  I have recommended it in the past.  Anyways, get ready for a ton more drama.  Johnny is already emailing other companies saying what a dick I am.

1. What’s the coolest place you’ve ever been?

The coolest country is easily Japan, but the best place is Boquete in panama.  It is a small mountain village.  It reminds me of the vision of utopia from Atlas shrugged.

2. When do you think you’ll settle down?

I’ll never settle down in one place permanently. 6 months in a place is tops.  Once you start traveling you just can’t stop.

3. If you could meet anyone, who would you choose?

Living person, Seth Godin, he is a  life changing genius.  I hope to train with him next year. From history, Benjamin Franklin.  He was really important and weird.  He wrote letters naked by the window.

4. Do you wish u were still the villain in the book or are you glad that in the end it was Tyler?

I wouldn’t wish that on Tyler.  But no, I wouldn’t change it.  I came off good and the book  matched how I saw it.

5.Was it really like the book at Project Hollywood?

It was even crazier than the book made it seem.  You couldn’t fit it all into the book.  5 out of 7 days we all got along.  There was not constant drama but there was tons of it.

—-

Overall I have to say that Tynan is one cool and normal dude.  He has a good sense of life and where he’s going.  I never would have thought when I read The Game myself 18 months ago that I would be chilling with one of the main characters in my house.  But it’s just more proof that anything in life is possible.

I hope that I get to meet more cool, normal guys in my life.  And I hope you enjoyed my little interview.

Also their philosophy of a man being a 10 perfectly dovetails with my theory. I have been talking to Soul and Stickler a lot lately about giving value. And I will go into more detail in a specific article. They believe that a 10 raises the value of everyone they talk to. It’s how to be a legend. Rather than seem like a legend.

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